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31May

Put Love 1st

Posted by: R. Mordant Mahon Categories: Blog Dating Relationships
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Put love first.  When you concentrate on your job, you succeed.  When you invest time learning about a career skill, your favorite sports team, even more about your friends, you become an expert in those fields.  What about the Arena of Love?  Don’t you think you should spend more time and effort in that area?  You do want a fabulous love life…don’t you?  When it comes to your relationship, are you the student, reluctant to crack your textbooks…or the connoisseur?

It’s no secret, your relationship is not something you can set & forget, just “wishing” for the best.  You have to do something about it, growing the intimacy in your life…even when you’re not in the mood.  I’m not saying you should look at this like work.  Love isn’t a chore…though sometimes it may feel that way.  Have fun with cultivating deeper intimacy in your life.  Treat it like a new fascination, looking for opportunities to get back to romantic playtime.  The feelings will follow, especially when you and your partner begin to turn up the steam.

When you put love first, you concentrate on it, you focus on it.  You’re putting God and the Universe, as well as yourself and your partner on notice that you’re serious about having intimacy in your life.  Begin doting on your relationship as you would a favorite hobby.  Have a weekly Date Night, where you and your mate get back to your romantic roots.  Read up on the latest regarding intimacy, relationships, and—yummy—sex!  Create a Dream Board with your partner, pasting pictures of what you want your relationship to look like on a board suitable for framing.  Do whatever voodoo you need do, but…

Put—Love—First!

R. Mordant Mahon

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28May

Open The Door For Her

Posted by: R. Mordant Mahon Categories: Blog Dating Relationships
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We live in a society that vacillates between whether or not it is okay for men behave as gentlemen and women to act and expect to be treated like ladies.  In her book Miss Manners’ Guide to Excruciatingly Correct Behavior, Judith Martin says “Miss Manners has a puzzling time trying to decide why one courtesy is ‘demeaning’ and another is a ‘gesture of respect,’ and therefore would like to forget the entire symbolic aspect of this ritual. . . .  We agree that the opening and shutting of car doors will not be a test of character or physical strength. . . .”

Get into the practice of opening the car door for her—even if she’s driving.  Not just for her in specific, but all hers.  By doing so, you will set yourself apart—from all other sons, suitors, and spouses.  Walk over to her door and open it for her.  Hold it open until she gets in, and then close it.  Important Safety Tip:  Wait until she’s all the way in to close the door.  (You lose major cool points for catching her or any part of her outfit in the car door.)

If you want to stand out from the rest of your ilk, then make the strong choice to show courtesy—at least in this one aspect.  Make this a part of your regular routine.  It’s not sexist; it’s polite.  Open the door for any woman with which you’re riding.  Do it in spite of strange looks.  Do it no matter how many times she tells you it’s not necessary.  Do it until it feels weird not to.

It doesn’t matter who you are or what walk of life you claim as your own.  From Ivy Leaguer to Inner City Gangsta, you will set yourself at the front of the pack by performing this small courtesy.  You will be remembered.  First as that guy, then as that boyfriend, and then as that husband by all her friends.  If you’re not looking for a mate, then you are that fellow.  No matter what, you’ll be the guy with that special something.  At the end of the day, not a bad way to be remembered.

R. Mordant Mahon

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28May

Dating As Couples – Why Do It?

Posted by: R. Mordant Mahon Categories: Blog Dating Relationships
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Every time I bring up the subject of dating to my married and coupled friends, I get blank stares and we’re-out-of-that-game attitude.  Dating is something you should do your entire life.  In other words, it’s not just for singles any more.

A relationship is a living, breathing organism – not unlike a newborn that you must nurture and feed.  You can’t just leave it alone and hope for the best.  If you want your most intimate relationship to bring the best that life has to offer, you have to put in some time and effort.  In fact, you should spend more care cultivating your relationship than you did catching this “big fish” in the first place.  Oh yes, and it should be fun.  This is where Dating comes in – even in the bonds of a relationship.

Have dinner, take a stroll on a hot summer night, picnic in the park – anything as long as it’s the both of you, spending time together.  Don’t let anything get in the way of Date Night.  Nothing is more important than the relationship you will be creating by spending quality time reaching out to the person you call your most Intimate.

Go out on a date with your loved one – your spouse, your fiancé, your boyfriend/girlfriend.  It doesn’t matter what point you’re at in your relationship, you should date.  Intimacy happens when you spend a quantity of time in your love one’s company.  The level of intimacy depends on the quality of that time spent.

R. Mordant Mahon

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